New Years day felt weird to me.

The truth is

I’m terrified things will go back to normal.

Normal.

Where we pretended we were okay.
Where we covered up our anxiety with to-do lists and activities.
Where we resorted to mindless commitments to not have to think about what we truly want.
Where we hid behind random hints of diversity to cover up our engrained racism.
Where we denied our tendency towards abuse because everyone was doing it.
Where we hid behind Instagram smiles and perfected our headshots.

I’m terrified.

I’m afraid we’ll forget what it feels like to be with ourselves.
To be true with the problematic and harmful systems that we ALL play into.
To slow down enough to hear our own thoughts and feelings.
To have no way out of the frustration, but through.

I know this year has been hard in so many ways, and differently for different people.

But I also know that this year brought to the surface the things that were driving the ship.

The story lines that were actually driving us.

And our world was able to work more clearly with what’s actually happening.
And many of us were able to do that in our own lives.

Challenging- yes.
But a little more honest- also maybe yes.

I keep seeing the posts that warn us not to get complacent in our anti-racism and overall justice fight, and I guess, my fear is somewhat similar.

Let’s not go back to “normal.”

Let’s create something new.
Let’s rebuild.
Let’s ignite this year from our hearts.
Let’s actually start living in (closer) alignment to what we know to be true.

If we didn’t already know it, 2020 taught it to us.
Now
Let’s live it.

🖤